preview

...and i wonder, is it worth it?
i look over to the boy next to me. the boy who stole my heart the first day i saw him in his mismatching cotton blends. he looked back at me, and i saw in his eyes that he loved me. yet somehow, he couldn't bring himself to actually do just that.
"i don't think i can hang out with you any more, matty," i said weakly.
"why do you say that?" he inquired.
"you made me love you. you didn't mean to, but your presence next to me was just enough to do so. i can't go on hurting like this, because when i look into your eyes, i can't handle masking the fact that i want you so badly inside, and it drives me nuts."
the silence was pounding so hard in my head, that i realized there actually was no silence, my heartbeat was just so out of control that's all i could hear while i was waiting for a reply....

more to be heard.

my poem

"The Letter"




I’m writing this letter, to whom, I don’t know. But, if I give you this, then please don’t go. I’m sorry, but I’ve something to share. You’re the one who makes me care. Maybe the skies do hold something up above, because you to me He sent to love. I may not on the outside show this feeling, because long ago, my emotions were for the stealing. I built such a great defense, slowly lost my feeling sense. With each time my name you call, brick by brick you make them fall. I hope with this I do not scare, or get a lonely, frightened stare. I may not be able to say aloud, for this I am not truly proud. I only write because it’s true. I found my strength inside of you. With every touch you excite, my heart so high like a kite. Of course, that means there is a string, but I don’t mind this little thing. For it leads down to your strong hands, those strong, yet make no demands. I hope forever can be true, because I would spend it all with you. I hope you do not shy from truth, to me that is very uncouth. There is one thing I’m out to do, to tell you that, yes, I love you.


Phoenix

just briefly

suddenly, i'm dating three guys, and i feel things have gotten out of hand. at least i'm enjoying life a little though. hopefully things will progress and i will see who is more worth a try.

short story underway. look for "signed, with love," soon.